Sex & Relationships

I’m a therapist — here’s why video gaming isn’t always a red flag in a partner

ESC + R = Escape the red flag.

Emily Cooper, a licensed clinical social worker based in Utah and Washington, has revealed that dating video gamers isn’t always a red flag, despite inherent negative perceptions about them.

In a one-minute and 28-second clip, posted on her TikTok account @therapybyemily, Cooper explained why dating someone who enjoys video games shouldn’t be a turn-off.

“Justice for the gamers,” Cooper captioned the video with more than 26,000 views.

The therapist, a fellow gamer who has been married for 10 years, admitted that there’s a difference between a partner who views video games as a hobby versus being addicted to the game console.

“I know a lot of people who would be like, ‘Oh, my gosh, I like this guy, but he’s a gamer — and that kind of bugs me,” she said in the TikTok clip. 

Many people avoid dating a gamer because they don’t want to be with someone who prioritizes gaming over their relationship.

“These are the type of gamers who have difficulty balancing gaming with other aspects of their lives, including relationships, school [or] work,” Cooper explained.

Cooper believes there is a difference between an addicted gamer and someone who purely enjoys gaming as a past-time
TikTok / @therapybyemily

The Post reached out to Cooper for further comment.

While she is well aware of the red flags that come with dating an addicted gamer, she noted that the “important thing to remember is that is not all gamers.”  

She unveiled that some people have self-control and know how to step away from the game.

“There can be someone who enjoys a good video game and can also pause it to take out the trash and can also stop it to take care of the kids or go on a date or whatever,” she continued.

The therapist pointed that out someone who prioritizes gaming over their relationship is a red flag.
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However, Cooper admitted that she enjoys it when her husband plays video games because it allows her to have the proverbial “me time.”

“I don’t want to do everything with my husband,” the therapist shared. “‘If I want to watch Magic Mike XXL [or] Fifty Shades of Grey, do I want him in there with me for my little movie night? No, I want him video gaming.”

Many people resonated with Cooper’s viewpoints about being in a relationship with a gamer.

“Hubby is a gamer and it’s actually so nice I don’t have to worry about him being out of the house lol,” joked one person.

“The cutest thing for me is watching my husband play video games with our kiddos pretending to play too,” gushed a mom.

“As a therapist that uses video games in session, they can be so therapeutic and beneficial,” another added.

Cooper encouraged couples to have their own hobbies because the honeymoon period doesn’t last forever. But you also should be open to sharing your hobby with your partner, she said.

The content creator admitted that she encourages her husband to play video games when she wants alone time.
TikTok / @therapybyemily

“My husband isn’t an artsy guy, but he will 100% come with me to art galleries and be really nice and engaged about it,” she explained. 

“So they don’t have to like it, but can they come with you to your thing? And vice versa.”  

Although she isn’t a fan of sports-focused games, she will attend a basketball game to support her husband’s interest while having a good time.

Cooper believes you shouldn’t yuck someone’s yum — even if it’s your partner.

“I wouldn’t want someone to judge me for my hobbies, like reading my little fairy-porn books, so I don’t want to judge someone else for their hobbies.”